Saturday, June 30, 2012

Update on my long night! :)

I sat in triage in Labor and Delivery being monitored last night from 10PM to 6:30AM this morning. Thank you for all the prayers! I am so blessed and thankful my cervix did not change anymore even with all the crazy contractions I was having last night. I am still 50% effaced and dilated to nearly 2. They gave me another dose of steroids to help mature baby Jude's lungs since the first dose I had at 26 weeks. They felt since it has been so long since first dose it would benefit Jude to have a second dose now. It took them a while to get my contractions to calm down enough that they felt safe to send me home.

At 11:30PM I took my dose of Procardia and my contractions calmed down for a short while, but came back and were consistent and strong. Around 1:30AM-2AM they gave me the first injection of Terbutaline. This helped the contractions mellow out for about an hour then they came back with a vengeance! As time grew closer to 3:30AM they had me take my next dose of Procardia and gave me another injection of Terbutaline. This helped the contractions calm so after a couple hours (6AM) of little contractions they checked my cervix again and PRAISE JESUS it had not progressed anymore!! They released me to go home at 6:30 AM. I was quite excited about this because I had been awake for 24 hours and well I was pretty much a Zombie! haha I tried to sleep but the contractions were too consistent some painful and some just too annoying to be able to sleep. Not to mention that the triage beds feel like you are laying on bricks! lol

Of course, once I got home and ate breakfast it was about time to take my next dose of Procardia, which I could tell because the contractions returned. I took it and slept for 3 hours in MY bed!! woohoo! I still need more sleep, but I don't feel like a total zombie anymore! haha. Oh and I managed to sneak in another hour nap! :) Tonight I will be going to bed really early!

Today I have noticed I have a lot of pelvic pressure and pain, and I am still contracting on and off as my Procardia starts to wear off. Sadly, contracting like this as it nears the time to take my next dose has been fairly normal for me with the pregnancy. I always wondered if contracting hard for 30-1hr a day multiple times a day was enough to make cervical changes. Well, now I can say YES because I am making those changes. :/ I have an appt with my OB this Thursday the 5th, but I may try and change it to Monday or Tuesday especially since the OB that was dealing with my labor in the hospital last night was the OB on call for the weekend not my OB.

I will admit it is hard to push through the frustration and fear of the preterm labor and see the joy. I have to remind myself where my true joy really is and comes from. I know that my joy is in the LORD, and that HE will continue to be faithful and give Taylor and me the strength to make it through this trial. I received just a glimpse of His goodness and faithfulness as He blessed me with a nurse who is a sister in Christ. He laid it on her heart to pray over me/with me. So she held my hands and cried out to our GOOD GOD for his peace and comfort, and for His protection over sweet Jude. I have never been in the care of a medical professional who has prayed with me, but it was so needed and such a blessing to hear her pour her heart out to our Savior for me and this baby who she doesn't even know. It was so bittersweet! I say bittersweet because the circumstances of why I was there were not pleasant, but her genuinely crying out to the Lord for my family was beautiful!! Such a beautiful display of the cross! :)

I am so close to the end, but yet it feels so far away. I will be 33 weeks on Monday!! THANK YOU JESUS!!! I am so excited to be this far, and not any earlier in my pregnancy. My OB really wants this little boy to hang in there for 3 more weeks, and I would love that as well. Only God knows when he will be born. I do know that baby Jude will come on God's perfect timing, and He will grant us the grace to get through it whether he is born early or at term. I know that God is good and I have to continue to lay all my fears, struggles, anxieties, and doubt at the feet of Jesus. Even as scary as last night was I was in peace because I was resting in the comfort of my Lord, and knowing He is sovereign, good, and knows what we are experiencing better than anyone else. So I am resting in Him and the shadow of His wings.

Psalms 56:3-4 When I am afraid, I put my trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I shall not be afraid. What can flesh do to me?

Matthew 11:28-30 "Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burned is light."

I was reminded of this verse last night by one of my sweet friends. Thank you.

Psalms 55:22 Cast your burden on the LORD, and He will sustain you; He will never permit the righteous to be moved.

Even in the midst of this storm I have never felt so blessed. Blessed my an amazing husband who is caring the burden of so much, and still manages to love me well. I am so utterly encouraged by him and so beyond in love with this man. I could not imagine a more amazing husband to be going through this with. He has taken on so much and yet the Lord has sustained him, and he is managing it well all by the grace of GOD. He is still working so hard at work, which has been challenging because it is a busy and stressful time for him at work right now with so many projects and deadlines. He comes home cares for Josiah, prepares meals, cares for me, cleans, prays with me and leads me, leads a city group, serves at church, and the list goes on. I have been so encouraged by watching him grow in his relationship with Christ even if he does not see it!! ;) I love you Taylor more than words could ever express. I so beyond appreciate ALL you do and are doing. Thank you.

One last thing before I wrap this blog up :) I have so many people covering Jude and my family in prayer that it has been amazing to see God work. I feel those prayers. I am so blessed and beyond grateful for all of you who have prayed for my family. Know that this means more to our family than you will ever know!! :)

Friday, June 29, 2012

Late night in hospital :(

Tonight is a tough night. I started spotting today and decided to go to hospital. I am dilated to a one almost a two and 50% effaced. The contractions have been strong and consistent. My dear prayer warrior family and friends please be praying that Jude stay put at least another 3 weeks.

I know God is good and in control so im trusting in Him and seeking peace, comfort, and shelter in Him. He is so good. :)

Isaiah 40:28-31 28 Have you not known? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable.
29 He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength.
30 Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted;
31 but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Rough and frustrating day, but reminded of God's grace

*sigh* Where do I begin? Today was extremely challenging to say the least. The last couple days I have noticed that my contractions have returned. :( Talk about disappointing. Right now I take the procardia every 4 hrs and it takes roughly 30 minutes to kick in. Over the weekend I noticed that right at 4 hours I have begun to contract and they become more consistent as I wait for the medicine to start working. Once the Procardia begins working the contractions disappear for a while, but then return at the 4 hour mark. I have tried to not allow the return of the contractions bother me until today. 

Yesterday and today I have noticed that when I do have contractions they have become very painful. They actually take my breath away, and if I am walking to the bathroom and have one I have to stop walking and breathe. These contractions have bothered me more because all the consistent ones I had in the past were uncomfortable, but not painful. Today I also experienced a lot of cramping and lower back pain and noticed that this began about 3.5 hours into my Procardia. With that being said, I have started to become discouraged. Trying to understand what the Lord is trying to teach me through this. Frustrated at the fact that the Procardia only seems to be effective for a week or two before the dosage has to be increased. I just don't understand why the Preterm Labor keeps haunting me. Satan is crouching at the back door ready to pounce on my weakness knowing my discouragement and frustration, but I REFUSE to allow satan to take me captive. I have been set free in Christ.  

1 Peter 5: 8-11 Be Sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world. And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you. To Him be the dominion forever and ever. Amen.  

All I can say is God is SO SO GOOD!!! Even in the midst of my frustration and doubt He has redeemed me! Given me so much grace and love! He has given me the strength to endure this complicated pregnancy and will continue to give me the strength. 

Philippians 4:13 I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.

I felt so weak and broken, and the Lord reminded me today that His yoke is easy and burden is light (Matthew 11: 28-30) and Christ is ALL I have and He is my life. Regardless, of what happens HE is good. HE is GOD. HE will continue to love me, forgive me, show me grace and mercy. Ultimately, He is in control and knows the perfect time for Jude to make his arrival into this world.  I love that I serve this BIG ALMIGHY GOD. We had city group tonight, and some of my amazing church family came to our house to do a praise and prayer session since I have not been able to attend church.  The praise music we sang was PERFECT and the prayer session was PERFECT. The Lord reminded me just how GOOD HE truly is. 1 Timothy 1:17 says to the King of ages, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honor and glory forever and ever. 1 Timothy 6:16 He who alone has immortality, who dwells in unapproachable light, whom no one has ever seen or can see. To HIM be honor and eternal dominion. Amen.  These scriptures reminded me how perfect and big my GOD is. 

I know that God is faithful always. I know that HE is and will be faithful during this trial. I will be honest though this trial SUCKS, although I do not know many trials that don't suck! lol The prayers of the men and women I was sitting in my living room with were so encouraging, and the LORD knew exactly what I needed to hear and be reminded of. The songs that were sang were also needed because I needed to be reminded of how much GOD loves me. His love for me is so incomprehensible. The closest I can even begin to understand is by thinking about how much I love Josiah and Jude and how I want only the best for them, and GOD loves me SO MUCH MORE than that and wants what is BEST for me (what I think is best comes NO where near to what is God's best). Needless, to say I balled my eyes out. Tears of brokenness and surrender knowing that the ONLY ONE who truly understands and the ONLY ONE who can bring me peace, comfort, and mercy is my God. After all, He is the God of all comfort. 

2 Corinthians 1: 3-5
Blessed be the God and Father of our Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction. With the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as we share abundantly Christ's sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too.

I am so grateful that the Lord has kept Jude in my womb thus far. I turned 32 weeks this past Monday, which is a huge milestone! I will be honest though, I know that survival rate at this point is high but I really do not want to have to watch my sweet baby boy sit in the NICU. I know that if this were to happen the Lord would grant me the grace, mercy, and strength to endure it, but I really am hoping to make it to the 36 week mark. Please continue to be in prayer for this sweet baby boy!

Psalms 139:13-14 For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

Sunday, June 24, 2012

found this encouraging!

Just a short blog today! A few days ago a friend sent me a link to this blog:

My husband and I found it both extremely encouraging since we are in the midst of the same situation! enjoy! :)

Friday, June 22, 2012

Oh so thankful

I am a little over a week into full bedrest, and some days have been challenging as others have been pleasant! I am so truly blessed that my Redemption Hill Church family have such serving and loving hearts. They stepped up to help without us having to ask for help. Right now, Taylor leaves for work at 7 am and I have someone that comes to help with Josiah and help me with whatever I need from 7am-12pm, and then another person comes to help in the afternoon from 12pm-5pm. (Taylor gets home from work at 5pm) Somedays I have the same person here all day. It has been nothing less than amazing and a blessing to see the hearts of the women in my church who are so willing to serve my family any way necessary during this time.

Although, having people here doing everything for me comes with its challenges! Some days Josiah has tested the person who is here caring for him. He has given some of the people a hard time when trying to take him to the bathroom, and he has been waking up extra early (4am) I think because having different people here all the time is so different for him. Even with these small difficulties he has done better than I expected adjusting to different people caring for his needs! He is eating up all the attention he is receiving! :) I am so thankful for the grace that the Lord has shown us in this area, especially because I had so much anxiety about it.  I had much anxiety about it especially in the first few days and I was reminded of these verses: 

Matthew 6:34 “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.

1 Peter 5: 6-7 Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.

Each day of bed rest is becoming easier because the Lord is humbling me more and more so I am having to allow people to cook and prepare my meals for me, which was one of the biggest struggles for me as well as care for Josiah's needs. My default was to just have everyone make me a bowl of cereal because I didn't want to burden them with having them heat and/or cook anything for me. Although as each day passes I am being more humbled, therefore becoming more able to ask people to heat my meals or make me a sandwich,etc. All the women who have served thus far have done an AMAZING job with Josiah and have joyfully prepared my meals and brought me anything I needed. It is such a beautiful display of Jesus and His love as He was and is The Servant King.

As far as preterm labor symptoms have been going... I was doing well for about a week and then on Wednesday night I had a hard time sleeping because my back and body hurt so much from laying/sitting all day so I did not fall asleep until midnight. For those who know me know 12am is LATE because I am usually in bed by 8pm. I didn't think to set my alarm because I normally wake up around 3:30AM to take my meds since my body has become used to waking up at that time.  Sadly, since I didn't go to bed until midnight I never woke up, and so I didn't take my pill. As a result I woke up Thursday morning around 6:30 AM feeling horrible and had consistent contractions. I also did not feel well stomach wise and didn't eat much all day, but I don't know if that was due to a lack of sleep or something else. Now I know I ABSOLUTELY CANNOT miss a dose of my procardia, especially since I woke up with contractions even though I had been sleeping all night and was not active.

I am so excited to meet sweet Jude! Only 4 more weeks and 2 days until the Doctor will allow him to make his appearance!!! God truly is so good! <3
Here is a photo that my wonderful friend and sister in Christ took during our maternity photo shoot that we had with her. I absolutely love this photo. Thank you April Harnish!!

Sunday, June 17, 2012

Strength to endure a complicated pregnancy

This pregnancy has been so incredibly challenging and sure has stretched my faith! I have had to constantly stay in God's word to keep from crumbling. I have also had many brothers and sisters in Christ covering baby Jude, me, and Taylor in prayer! Here are the verses that I have constantly meditated on the past 7 months!!! Beware there are A LOT of verses!!!

Matthew 6: 34 

Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.

Matthew 11:28-30 

28 Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”

Romans 5:1-5 

Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. 2 Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God. 3 Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, 4 and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, 5 and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.

Romans 12:12 
12 Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.

2 Corinthians 12: 9-10 
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 10 For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Hebrews 4: 16 
Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.
Philippians 4: 4-7 
4 Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. 5 Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; 6 do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4: 13 
I can do all things through HIM who strengthens me.

James 1: 2-4 
2 Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, 3 for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. 4 And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

1 Peter 5: 6-7 
6 Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, 7 casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.

1 Thessalonians 5: 16-18 
16 Rejoice always, 17 pray without ceasing, 18 give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.

Lamentations 3: 22-25 
The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases;his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. "The LORD is my portion," says my soul, therefore I will hope in Him."
Proverbs 3: 5 
Trust in the Lord with all your heart,and do not lean on your own understanding.
1 Chronicle 16:11 
See the LORD and his strength; seek his presence continually!

Sweet baby Jude

      After our birth experience with Josiah, Taylor and I were nervous about having anymore children. We prayed a ton about it and went back and forth with yes we want another and no. We were especially struggling with the decision because since the hemorrhage during delivery with Josiah I had been suffering from severe iron deficiency anemia, and in July 2011 found out that I have a mild bleeding disorder where my blood doesn't clot. By the end of 2011 we decided we wanted to trust in the Lord and give Josiah a sibling. We prayed about having another baby a lot before trying. We began trying in early November and found out in early December we were expecting another blessing!! Our sweet baby is due to arrive Aug 20, 2012! We were and still are ecstatic!

As much as we are rejoicing in another blessing and gift from the Lord this pregnancy has been nothing short of challenging and complicated. This pregnancy has pushed our faith to the limits, and caused us to cling so tightly to the Lord. 

At 7 weeks pregnant I went to the ER with abdominal pain and consistent contractions 4-5 minutes apart. The baby looked healthy, but I had once again a subchorionic hemorrhage. I followed up with my Doctor within the next few days and was placed on partial bedrest which included the following: no exercise, no heavy cleaning, pelvic rest, no lifting over 15lbs, and stay off feet whenever possible. With this type of hemorrhage in early pregnancy you are at high risk of miscarriage. Taylor and I immediately had to give this situation to our GREAT PHYSICIAN, Healer, Father, and Savior. We prayed and put our sweet baby's life into the hands of our God, and knew that whatever the outcome was for our baby that it was and is for our good and His glory.

The doctors kept a close eye on the hemorrhage and our sweet baby. In most women the hemorrhage goes away on its own, but sadly mine did/has not. As you become further in pregnancy the risk changes from miscarriage to preterm labor and/or placenta abruption. The partial bedrest was also continued. This was extremely challenging with a 17 month old who had a ton of energy, and at the time we were living in a two story house.

Praise Jesus Josiah transitioned into a big boy bed easily from his crib in Jan/Feb 2012 so I no longer had to pick him up and take him out of the crib. In March of 2012 we were able to buy a home, A ONE STORY!!!!! On March 19th we learned that we were being blessed with another baby BOY!!! Sweet baby Jude!! We again were/are extremely ecstatic!!

At 16 weeks I began having preterm labor. :( I was placed on a medication called terbutaline, but it did not work so I was switched to Procardia. I had to take it twice a day, and it had terrible side effects. So eventually my doctor told me I could lower my dose to once a day and see how I do. All was well for a few week, but at 25 weeks contractions began to be intense and consistent. I saw my doctor at 26 weeks and she increased my procardia to 20mg every 6 hours, I had to receive a steroid injection to help mature Baby Jude's lungs, and also found out that I started to have cervical change. 

The next week was absolutely HORRIBLE because I started having bad side effects from the procardia. My eyes, hands, and feet began swelling every time I took it, rapid heartbeat, shortness of breath, drowsiness, joint pain, headache, dizziness, and near fainting. How could I care for my son when I felt like I was going to die every time I took my medicine? I saw my doctor the following Wednesday and she lowered my medication to 10 mg every 6 hours. I still had side effects but they were much more manageable.

All was well for a couple weeks, but at 29 weeks I began having frequent contractions 2-3 min apart. My medication was increased to every 4 hours and I have been placed on strict bedrest. Strict bedrest means I am only allowed to get up to use the bathroom and I am able to shower. Having a 2 year old and being on bedrest is a challenge! Taylor and I have been blessed by an AMAZING church family who has stepped up to serve us and take shifts caring for Josiah and helping with meals, etc. So here we are at 31 weeks with 5 weeks left to go before our baby boy is okay to make his entrance into the world. I say 5 weeks because my doctor wants to try and keep baby Jude in my womb until 36 weeks.

Through this journey I have had to be humbled greatly by my Savior to allow others to serve me. This is challenging for me because I would rather serve than be served so when you have to have someone care for your child, clean, cook, get your water, etc for you any pride you have has to be crushed. This is my 4th day into strict bedrest and even to have my husband serve me hand and foot has been hard. Yet I know by God's grace I will make it through these next challenging 5 weeks, one day at a time!!

Yesterday was an extremely tough day as I felt helpless and like a burden. I struggle with the fact that I am the homemaker and heart of the home yet I am unable to serve my husband and care for my child. It is hard not to feel like a failure as a mom and wife. I felt so completely defeated and weak. So much so that the last few days I have struggled to pray to my good and merciful father in heaven, who loves me more than I can ever comprehend. I had to push through the lack of desire and cry out to my GOD. Cry out to HIM in my weakness and pain. The verse that the Lord reminded me of yesterday was this...

2 Corinthians 12: 9-10 9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 10 For the sake of Christ, then,I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Through my roller coaster of emotions and moments of weakness my husband has been so gracious to me and has loved and served me well these past 7 months and especially the last 4 days. I would not want to be on this journey with anyone else. As I know this is just for a short season and its for my good and God's glory. Even in the midst of this storm GOD IS GOOD and here every step of the way and I truly am SO BLESSED!!!!

Thank you Taylor for truly being an amazing man of God and loving me like Christ loves the church!! :)

Sweet baby Jude you are already so loved by so many and have been covered in prayer since the beginning! We are all eager to meet you when the time is right!! xoxo Thank you to ALL of you that have been praying for Jude and my family through this trial!! :)

Pregnancy and birth of Josiah

The pregnancy was a little complicated at the beginning because I had a subchorionic hemorrhage, which is where your placenta does not correctly attach and hemorrhages into the uterus. In early pregnancy the SH puts you at high risk for miscarriage. At 10 weeks I began bleeding heavy, went to the ER, Taylor and I sat and cried and prayed over our sweet baby that was already such a blessing as we thought we were miscarrying. Praise Jesus our baby was healthy, and the blood was from the hemorrhage and it was GONE!! woohoo!! We were excited by this news! I was no longer on restriction. Most of the remaining pregnancy went well!! We found out in Decemeber 2009 we were expecting a sweet healthy baby boy!! We were so overjoyed! 

At 30 weeks we had our 3rd trimester ultrasound and were told Josiah was a week behind in growth and amniotic fluid was low. At 33 weeks Josiah was 3 weeks behind in growth and measuring in the less than 10th percentile and my amniotic fluid was still low. I was placed on strict bedrest until I was induced at 38 weeks. For the duration of my pregnancy I received many ultrasounds of our little guy, which was amazing to see him grow and be able to see first hand God knitting him together.

Psalms 139:13-14 For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb.
14 I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.

I was induced on Monday morning at 11 AM on April 19, 2010 and Josiah made his arrival at 1:55 PM on April 20, 2010. He was beautiful and perfect weighing in at 6lbs 3oz and he measured 19 in long!! Sadly, my delivery was challenging and I hemorrhaged. I began delivery with 1300cc of blood and lost over 800 cc of blood. Most women lose about 200 during vaginal delivery and 500 during c-section. Sadly, the doctor and nurses were not prepared for my hemorrhage and were scrambling to find medications to make it stop and began pumping me full of IV fluid because they were not prepared with blood. There was much pain involved during the process of them trying to stop the hemorrhage and I was in and out of consciousnesses. After receiving 3 out of the 4 medications they can give you to stop bleeding the doctor was able to get my hemorrhage under control.

I was unable to hold my son until 2-3 hours after he was born, but once I saw his sweet face for the first time I was completely in love with this sweet blessing from the Lord!
Psalms 127:3 Behold, children are a heritage from the Lordthe fruit of the womb a reward.

I am so beyond thankful and blessed to be able to be here to raise our sweet boy!! Thank you Jesus! <3

Saturday, June 16, 2012

Josiah, our sweet son!

Through the years growing up I had many health problems. I was told by doctors they were unsure if I was able to become pregnant. Shortly after being married Taylor and I had tried for nearly a year to conceive and nothing. We decided to wait.

In 2009 we began praying together and crying out to God for a child. We cried out to him about our possible infertility and about our hearts desires for a child. We confessed to our God that we know He is the giver of life and whether we were to be parents by having a child naturally or through adoption we would accept either and love Him no matter what. We prayed for direction.
We began to look into adoption as we continued to pray about having children. End of July 2009 we decided we were putting our conception into the hands of our Big God and started trying. August 28, 2009 we found out were were 5 weeks pregnant!!! We cried tears of joy, thanked our amazing Lord, and shared the news with family! We knew that the Lord had heard our cry!! After all, HE is the ultimate physician and giver of life!!!

My blessings

6 years ago on May 19, 2006 I married an amazing man! We were neighbors growing up and high school sweethearts! My journey with my husband Taylor has been challenging and amazing at the same time. Without the beautiful display of the cross in the center of our marriage we would be nothing. Christ is our center, our rock, our glue.We have been through many ups and downs, but nonetheless I love him more than words could ever express. This past year has been one of the best years! The Lord decided to move us from Arizona to Indiana. A place we never thought we would live! lol We left everything we knew and our families behind in Arizona and began this new journey in Indiana. We had no one except Christ and each other. The Lord brought an amazing church family into our lives. Redemption Hill has been beyond a huge blessing and I am so thankful for them. They helped make the transition from AZ to IN much easier. Needless to say, this past year has broken idols in our hearts, made our marriage stronger, and our personal walks with Christ stronger. Although, we are not perfect and have fallen numerous times but Praise God for His forgiveness, mercy, and love!

Mark 10:7-9 'Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.' So they are no longer two but one flesh.What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate."